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Somebody Set Up Us The Hadron?

Published: Fri 12 Sep, 2008 | 17 Comments
Tags: Hadron, Collide, Collider, What does this have to do with games?, Wozza

 

Ok, so there’s a bit of a buzz around a certain experiment that could advance puny earth science… or destroy the planet? There’s of course a lot of theories and debate. Because this is the internet and it’s been ten years since I took science, I thought I’d chuck up my theories on something I don’t understand too.

 

Theory 1. The Smurf Theory.

 

 

When a relative atom is combined with another by a sizeable enough force, blue is created. Not just any blue though, oh no! It’s smurfing blue. If the balance of blue is too great, blue will infect every atom. This will eventually, over the course of a millennia turn us all blue too. And we all know the only pants and hats that look good with blue are white don’t we?

 

Theory 2. Groundhog Day

 

One possible unforeseen outcome of Boffins having too much free time, money and too many toys could the bending of time and space. Time being sometimes quite considerate has given us a window to either stop the experiment or to invent a flux capacitor to put an end to the loop. You have to ask yourself though, if we all remembered each loop, would it be too bad? No ageing or getting sicker, or would you get on the wrong side of that deal? No getting better and imagine being an infant all your life. Hopefully this happens on a sunny day.

 

Theory 3. Daleks

 

Of course the most likely and sound theory according to an emergency MSN meeting is that we are but pawns. The whole experiment was actually co-ordinated by Daleks as the first step in a plan to exterminate humanity. Of course they made us think it was our idea all along. Something about aligning planets and darkness… or something.

 

 

But fear not, the Osterhagen Key can destroy the Hadron… oh wait…

 


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COMMENTS (17)

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xSHADOWxReplyPosted by xSHADOWx on 13 September 2008, 12:20AM
defintely a 5 star blog. anything with a theory = 5 star.
 
howzitReplyPosted by howzit on 13 September 2008, 08:51AM
Little Britain=win
 
tim705ReplyPosted by tim705 on 13 September 2008, 09:14AM
Apparently there is a book about a conspiracy theory to do with the whole smash some protons together.
 
Syn-RynReplyPosted by Syn-Ryn on 13 September 2008, 09:33AM
Brilliant blog Woz.

Im still thing about how awesome it would be to put random objects it the collider. When I first heard about on the news I misheard and I though they were firing (Photon) Beans.
 
Grunt of GodReplyPosted by Grunt of God on 13 September 2008, 10:52AM
Hehe, beans
 
GenocideReplyPosted by Genocide on 13 September 2008, 03:58PM
Cod4 + Halo3 in the collider = perfection!
 
alienhominidReplyPosted by alienhominid on 13 September 2008, 03:59PM
5 star
 
xSHADOWxReplyPosted by xSHADOWx on 13 September 2008, 09:51PM
How about Jessica Alba and a young Kirsten Dunst in the coollider. Mmmm...
 
Daniel1987ReplyPosted by Daniel1987 on 15 September 2008, 12:51AM
Only problem with the smurf theory is that there'll be only one woman....
 
BlackRetinaReplyPosted by BlackRetina on 15 September 2008, 06:48PM
Halo 3 + CoD4 = a giant mess lol
 
alienhominidReplyPosted by alienhominid on 15 September 2008, 07:33PM
Daleks are cool
 
Dancing is ForbiddenReplyPosted by Dancing is Forbidden on 16 September 2008, 04:25PM
Every time I see this blog title, I read it as "Somebody set us up the hardon". That Dalek picture looks like it fits in quite well too...
 
alienhominidReplyPosted by alienhominid on 17 September 2008, 04:59PM
lol ^ "somebody set us up the HARDON"
 
RuptunexReplyPosted by Ruptunex on 18 September 2008, 01:13PM
Daleks are awesome. Doctor Who fan right here so yeah.
 
ParsnipzillaReplyPosted by Parsnipzilla on 7 October 2008, 10:04PM
I'll see y'all on the other side of the black hole...
 
RuptunexReplyPosted by Ruptunex on 13 October 2008, 01:41PM
We're still here...
 
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